Off to Tractor Supply we went, purchasing an oversized dog crate tall enough for long legs to grow into, colostrum, powdered baby goat milk, bottles, dog pads, and a teddy bear with a heartbeat to emulate its mother’s. (Yes, that’s a thing.) 

In the wild, mother deer will hide their babies in tall grass, their spots perfectly mimicking the shadows cast by the waving grass above. Sometimes, the two need a little help finding each other, and the baby deer will make a cry-like sound called bleating. I first learned about this noise when we were driving home from Tractor Supply. Levi was bleating and bleating, and wouldn’t stop until I gave him his first bottle. The cries soon began to soften, and it was a cue that he felt safe. We were going to be more than fine together. 

Bottle feeding a fawn is not just a once-a-day activity, but a five-plus-times-a-day activity. For the next foreseeable future, I was housebound and bottle bound. My sister was right, it was going to be an almost one-year commitment I had volunteered for. After a week of bottle feeding, my reality set in. 

Every morning, upon awakening, it was bottle time.  Most days that involved an alarm clock, one I had previously ditched. 

Sitting on my back porch steps, I would hold little Levi in my lap and talk calmly and soothingly while he gulped the bottle down. As Levi got bigger, steadier, and better at bottle drinking, our bond became stronger; as his heart began to open, mine began to soften. 

After feeding I would make sure to leave Levi alone outside, hidden in the tall grasses, to help familiarize him with the natural environment as I was determined to reintroduce Levi back into the wild when the time was right. 

For now, this “rewilding” of Levi involved a fenced-in yard, a kitten collar with a bell, and me walking outside every five minutes with binoculars to ensure that nothing bad was happening. Eventually, I traded the kitten bell for a GPS cat tracker, and my constant fears were (slightly) relieved. 

I was vigilant in my care and the bond between us grew as I was the only mother he knew, and I was going to make sure I was a good one.

Prior to acquiring Levi, I had committed to a girls’ trip with my sister, her two daughters, and her grand-baby to celebrate my niece, Dakota, receiving her doctorate in physical therapy. Of course, there was no one to watch Levi, (I couldn’t find a deer nanny) so boarding at the vet was the only viable option. 

It was the only time I had been away since caring for Levi, so I bundled up Levi’s belongings and drove to the vet… the drop-off was all seemingly going as planned.

However, one day into my trip the vet tech called to inform me that Levi wouldn’t let anyone near, therefore they were unable to bottle-feed him. They sheltered Levi in a barn stall, and placed the formula in a pan, hoping for the best. Needless to say, I was quite stressed the entire trip, and Immediately upon arriving home, I sped to the clinic, parked, and walked straight toward the barn. 

When I entered the stall, Levi was running in circles and would not let me near. It wasn’t until I said “Levi, it’s Mom” while stretching out my hands so he could smell me that he immediately started jumping all over me. It was the kindest and one of the sweetest moments of my life, and to this day I still swell up with tears just thinking about it.